I also celebrated 25 years - quarter of the century - since I came to USA. It’s official, I have lived on US land longer than on the Land of a Firebird, one that gave me birth and shaped me up as a human. It is both sad and exhilarating. I miss the simple hardships of daily life that is Russia yet grateful for the opportunities living in America afforded me – things to try and do and experience…and life here was anything but easy. Sometimes I wish I had those "Russian daily" difficulties vs what transpired here, not to mention the ease of regular, routine life (boring! where is the fight?), but really, it's what is, that life thing. I can't compare where I like "better", it's a silly question. It's not like I lived SAME periods of my life in each country in parallel. In Russia (of Soviet period, to add) I was young, vibrant, whole life ahead, but I was also stupid (read: young) and didn't look at many things in any way, with no eyes at all. I was just surviving, and I didn't know any other way. In US I matured, got some hard earned wisdom with years and mistakes and cumulative experiences - yet I also am not looking like a thrilled puppy who expects miracles. I calmed down. I made choices. I lived - and doing my best continuing doing so, may be, hopefully, with fewer mistakes.
On the knitting front I combed through my random 1-skein purchases while flipping pages of the Japanese Stitch Bible and came up with a few cute gifts for my friends' upcoming birthdays. One more of that 1-skein left to make a shawl for my sister - and hopefully I am in a cool-of period.
|In the reads post-hike months.|
Motivation is a powerful tool. Every failure, every painful moment, drives us harder. Sometimes it is to thrive. Mostly, it is just to survive, in all kinds of meaning of it. The only way you can get from where you are to where you want to be is find the motivation deep inside your soul. Ancestry DNA let me know I am 98% Russian. You can’t take THAT out of me.
Found these words by Alex Honnold (dang, he's got a new movie Free Solo that is NOT showing in Austin!!): "I think I define success as just being able to do the things I want to when I want to. Being able to fund the lifestyle. There’s no number that makes that possible. A lot of it has to do with how happy I am with what I’m doing."