When something bad happens, you have three choices: let it define you, let it destroy you, or let it strengthen you.
The heart of the difference is not ability or even talent, but desire
The purpose of life is to discover and develop your gift. The meaning of life comes from sharing your gift with others. - David Viscott
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Life IS beautiful, you just look the right way:)
I got accepted to run my dream run in San Juan mountains. Unbelievable. I am still totally high on this. It was one of the best unexpected presents that ever fell on my head out of nowhere, when I was ready the least. At least my training acquired focus, and it turned out, despite almost half a year of doing close to nothing (by my own standards anyway) I am not in as bad of a shape as I thought I am. Sometimes all we need is a kick in a butt:)
I pulled my guts in check and dropped out of Kinesiology class - why pay and spend so much precious time I don't have when the class is totally something I can take a Challenge test on? Well, now I need to study for this very test, but it ain't bad, and I am liberated by my decision.
I had a "talk" with my boss, literally telling him I am so unhappy I am about to go. At first he said "well, look for another job", and then he kind of stepped back, and we found some middle ground, and I am kind of hanging in there for a little longer. Not so bad it all is, really, just totally lost desire, and I don't like to work under these conditions.
Stephen is just awesome. I keep looking back at where Alex was at this age, and it's so freaking different, like day and night. His grades improved (just got second quarter report), his interest in sports is high, his dreams are absolutely wonderful, and it's nice to talk to my kid - something I didn't do much with my first one. I am one happy mama.
We got official permits for Oregon 100M race! Yeah! Thrilled, so thrilled to work on this race, the idea of which I nursed for exactly 2 years now (I remember how at Hagg Lake trail work, in February 2007, I mentioned it to those I was cutting the brush with - and received immediate support. It took me another 9 months to dwell on it longer, and then get Bushwhacker on board - and things went with normal speed. If we weren't late with applying for permit a year ago, we could have put it last year, but , oh, well, 2009 it is). It's going to be great.
And then we had this little run in Pier Park this Saturday. I was apprehensive, honestly, when Mike decided to put it on in addition to our PCT 50 and PCT 100. I mean, I am a mountain runner, and 1M loop within city limits didn't inspire me one bit. Stupid. I accept responsibility of being completely stupid. Why? What's wrong with loop, city and mo high drops? It's the people!!! Idiot. So glad he didn't let me back away. To add to it, when I finally visited park to check out the course, it turned out to be a gem! A nice very rolling-hilly loop, 2/3 of it on dirt, and all in tall old fir trees. Wow! Like it's not city at all. So we did it. Caroline was the best! Without her help it wouldn't have gone that smoothly, not to mention without her selfless standing at the loop check all 6 hrs Mike and I wouldn't have been able to put 10 miles each. We had 26 runners, so nice for the first time and short notice! Family...you heard it from me a thousand time. We are all family. So nice to see you, guys. Such high spirit, smiles, hard work. Geoffrey D. was chicked for the first time in his life - by a girl from Salem Pam. For the whole time, while cheering her on, we wondered where she got here from and why we don't know her. Well, she is new, but boy, she is fast! Got 42M in 6 hrs and won overall. Geoffrey was in great spirit, despite my fun-making (with love, of course). Thank you, runners, for coming. Thank you, Caroline, for working the AS and timing table. Thank you, Michelle, for cooking awesome soup for the finish line. It went great - and the sun broke out mid-day to lighten the mood even more!
I went for a little jog, and ended up with 10 miles, 3 of which I did as a timed tempo. I am pretty happy with how it went. No, scratch this - very happy. Because it's not where I was years ago I am comparing to, but where I am now. And an improvement is obvious. I even got out to Forest Park this morning, stiff and sleepless, and didn't bail of my initial plan of doing 21 miles. In a process I realized I am going to end up with 80 miles for the week - a big jump, but a big jump in confidence as well. Wow! And the time was good. Gives me lots of promises. I'll be back. I have to. I got this lil' hike to do in the middle of July:)
Larry had an awesome time at Rocky Raccoon races. He took his son to hang out, help out - ended up doing a bunch of things, from timing at the blind turn-around, to glow-stick marking, to working AS, and (!) - to pacing Andy JW to his win at 100M distance! Wow! So proud. Not only at the fact that his pacing helped Andy to keep Scott (the second guy) away, but for jumping at the opportunity to do such thing. Wish I was there to see it. Love it. Just love everything that surrounds ultrarunning events. Glad we both share it so closely.
My very good friend Rick paced my other good friend Tony to sub-24 there as well. And many others did an awesome job at RR in Texas. Congratulations to all. Seek the opportunities, don't let them seize. So proud. So happy for all.
One thing kind of got off "happy path". Stephen went to Tacoma, WA for a boxing tournament. He trained hard last 2 months, haven't missed a class (what he is known for), even ran on his own to pick up endurance (! - he is not running all that much), and - AND - got a hair cut! That was a huge sacrifice! And - while there, officials couldn't find him a match to box with (you know, it's not that simple, kids need to match in weight, age and experience at the same time). He is bummed. But having a good time hanging out anyway.
What else? Lots of little things. And not so little. But really, I am so smiling. Tired, achy - and smiling. Life IS beautiful. We just have to look in the right direction:)