When something bad happens, you have three choices: let it define you, let it destroy you, or let it strengthen you.
The heart of the difference is not ability or even talent, but desire
The secret of life is that there is no secret of life. It's all hard work. Yet you still have to find the right works and be free to choose direction that is best for you.
The purpose of life is to discover and develop your gift. The meaning of life comes from sharing your gift with others. - David Viscott
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
The battle with the pain continues. I went for another doctor appointment, re-did ultrasound and a bunch of blood work, and all cleared up (yep, whatever was floating in my gallbladder couldn’t be found anymore). I am turned out to be anemic, but it has nothing to do with pain. Clinical picture is so typical of gallstone attack, sans the nausea; we don’t know any other options. I did like this new doctor better, at least she was asking lots of questions and talking aloud of any remotely possible diagnosis. I am up for a CT tomorrow.
Interestingly, this woman turned out to be the one who treated my husband a year and half ago in ER, and she remembered me. I liked her then too, as after two other doctors who ran a bunch of high-profile tests, x-ray, US and such couldn’t figure things out; she came up with a fresh medical article. Oleg had just come down from climbing Mt. Rainier (in December 2004), was really dehydrated, and also caught up flu the day of his leaving for a trip. So when he was back, he had a fever, aches and whole nine yards of the flu plus peeing blood. She said it called “marching syndrome”.
Anyway, CT and a follow-up on Friday. Also some pain meds in a meantime (mmm, Vicodin...too bad I can only take it at night). She said she remembered me because there is not that often you get a family of crazy endurance athletes who are also MDs. I guess all Portland ultrarunners have their doctors elsewhere and not at OHSU.
This whole ordeal does bug me. I have 4 weeks left to WS100. This week and 2 following weeks are supposed to be my peak training (including SP50, what is my big training run, that’s all). My body feels great, and it pushes through every workout I come up with without any pain or soreness. Yes, I keep on high quality runs, rain and all (this is for you, hun). Unlike was suggested some time ago, I don’t have any gifts. Anything I ever achieved, running including, is due to my training. I also like it this way. I love running a lot, and no-one can put me on cross-training – hey, I ran through 4 stress fractures and a torn ligament (kids, don’t do it at home). I don’t back off – I have a thing for that, bruised ego or something. I am afraid if I ever succumb to my own complains, I’ll keep making excuses more and more, so I don’t start. I go on. Besides, if I don't, Rob will call me a sissy:)
Speaking of SP50. Last week I finally looked up at the race website and had my usual “OMG, why am I doing it again?” I guess Theresa Schut summed it up nicely (she happened to call that day) – because it’s interesting to see if we can. So, now that I am done with my fears ahead of time (the course goes between 7,000 and 9,200 feet, expect my altitude lungs shut-down report), I can focus on making through, hopefully not in a much more time than 12 hrs. I can’t afford to leave my training on this course, so it will be kind of what Capitol Peak 56 miler was last year 2 weeks prior WS100. Nice and easy, reaffirming the fitness and taking off the pre-race jitters.
Enough boring you with my little problems. I am sure it will get sorted out, somehow things always do.