When something bad happens, you have three choices: let it define you, let it destroy you, or let it strengthen you.

The heart of the difference is not ability or even talent, but desire

The purpose of life is to discover and develop your gift. The meaning of life comes from sharing your gift with others. - David Viscott

Friday, January 16, 2015

Follow your dreams!!!

A bird sitting in a tree is not afraid of the branch breaking because her trust is not in the branch, but in her own wings. - Unknown


Hot damn, I can't wipe the smile off my face! It's my last day working at UT, and in biochemistry research, and at 9-5 job! 20 years and 8 months to date...sure takes me long to make a move. But if first 6 years I was thankful for learning new skills and having a job in general in a country which language I didn't speak in a profession I wasn't properly trained for, and the following 5 years were the best out of my scientific career working in pharma industry on prostate cancer and HIV vaccine (closer to medicine I am versed in, well paid, and greatly appreciated by all around, with the utmost awesome supervisor), then 5 years in Stem Cell research with a fresh and curious boss and amazing real scientific break-through's, the last 5 years were a total drag from the get-go. The projects are boring out of the mind, the boss is a egocentric tyrant, the financial and growth intensives non-existent and 80% of the people are working 50% of the time, what always made me extremely uncomfortable (and sad that I often wasted my precious life away). 

It's over. I have no regrets, no fear, no anxiety. I am extremely happy for this step, for my future, and very grateful to my husband for supporting this move on all counts. I have to follow my calling, it's been way too long. I am put on this Earth to help people, one person at a time. I am to use my time, my knowledge, and my expertise wisely and fully, enjoy what I do, live every moment, and be happy - simply happy for myself, if you can imagine. I am doing something that simple - I am doing something just for me. It is going to be a great year. It is going to be amazing life - a whole life ahead. 

Sometimes my decisions take a long time to come, sometimes they are a snap, but I follow my heart, and when it feels right - it IS right. Took me years, over a decade, to pull the plug on my previous marriage, but when I did (7 years today officially) - I never looked back. Took me a split moment to sign up for a first race. first ultra, first 100 - couldn't be happier. Took me no time at all to move across the country and marry a guy I ran into on a trail - it wasn't always easy at first, but we made it work, and it was the most profound change I've made for my life. That's why I don't fear - on the opposite, super excited - about this decision. I KNOW it is going to be the best one yet, and now I have a team behind me.

And here is what my best friend sent me as a gift - a link from this blog.

one step.....

we all have heard
'every journey starts with the first step.'
and
'one step at a time.'
the list goes on.
this is true
tho
some of us
feel like we can't do 
whatever it is that lies before us
whatever life is asking of us
or
whatever it is that WE seek
because it feels too big. 
but the first step isn't a physical one
the first step starts within.
the first step on any journey
starts with our commitment.
commitment to ourselves.
when we commit to ourselves
it has to feel good.
if you have doubts about any decision
or any step
explore where these doubts are coming from.
if they truly come from within
your inner guidance saying, 'no way!'
then
of course listen!
but if the doubts are coming from:
'what would so and so think.'
'how would that make me look?'
'but, i feel obligated to....'
then QUESTION it.
are you living for you?
or
are you living for someone else?
any and all decisions we make
-tho some may not be easy-
will feel good or bad.
weeding thru our feelings
and
recognizing where the feeling is coming from
will help us be more confident in our decisions. 
then we can commit.
once we commit
we are unstoppable.
tho sometimes the thought of committing brings fear.
are we afraid of our own power?
are we afraid
that really
we are magnificent?!
we are incredible, limitless, manifesting beings
trapped in the belief of 'not good enough'
or
'i can't'.
people
we can do anything we commit to
but we first have to commit.
committing is the hard part.
focus on how you feel.
go deep
to the place within you
where YOU really exists.
this is a place within the physical body
yet it goes infinitely deep.
in this place
your inner sanctuary
see how you really feel
about anything.
go there to ask questions
to seek answers
to KNOW
without a doubt
from the depths of your BEing
that whatever journey you are about to embark on
feels right
to YOU!
and if it does?!!!
commit.
that is the first and hardest step on any adventure
of any kind.
whether it's physical. relational. emotional. work related. etc.... 
from this point forward
decide to commit to YOU.
do what feels right to YOU
always.
THIS is a GIANT and the most important first step
on the journey to the center of you.
the MOST important journey you will ever travel.
you can do it.
yes you can!
commit to you. always.
and find the life you are looking for
(it is also looking for you).

6 comments:

Erin Earle said...

Congratulations on following your heart!! Very inspiring. Beautiful poem! <3

Kirstin C said...

I so admire your courage and I am very happy and excited for your new direction!

Jill Homer said...

Congratulations on making the leap!

Carilyn said...

Brava! Brava! Brava! I am so happy for you! This post brought tears to my eyes. Here is to a wonderful and adventurous 2015, Olga!

Jamie said...

This is something I am learning to do. Glad to hear you took the leap and are finally doing what you know you need to do. Love that! :)

Jesse Cooper said...

Wow it takes guts to do what you did. I just hope I am able to do it when the time comes. I know I need to soon.

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